Celebrity Kink

How do you replace Jesus?

It didn’t take Madonna long to answer that difficult question, as the singer has found a new boy toy in light of her break-up with Jesus Luz.

The Material Girl is reportedly dating Jon Kortajarena, a 24-year old Spanish model that appears in A Single Man. In that movie, he portrays a hustler Colin Firth’s character meets outside of a liquor store.

The pair met at the film’s NYC premiere.

Is Jon Kortajarena an upgrade or downgrade from Jesus Luz?

Kortajarena has been the face and body of Just Cavalli, Bally, Etro, and Trussardi. In December, Forbes Magazine ranked Kortajarena as the eighth most successful male model in the world.

That’s quite an honor, almost as pretigious as ranking first in Madonna’s bed… this morning, at least.

While Las Vegas locks down its waitresses in light of Tiger Woods’ release from sex rehab, golf course owners may soon need to do the same.

Sources report that the golfer is moving back to his Windermere, Florida residence next week and has locked in a return date to the sport that made him famous.

At the moment, Woods is planning to play in the Tavistock Cup, an event that pits professionals from the Isleworth Golf & Country Club against those from the Lake Nona Golf & Country Club. It takes place on March 22 and 23.

After that tournament, Woods will prepare for a tradition unlike any other, The Masters. It will be held in April in Georgia.

In posibly related news, Elin Woods has sent a text message to every woman in Georgia: I bought a new set of golf clubs. Consider yourself warned.

She was only featured for 20 seconds on the American Idol Orlando audition episode.

But those were a gorgeous 20 seconds.

Florida native Janell Wheeler sang “House of the Rising Sun” in front of the judges and impressed them with her vocal range and good looks. We don’t mean to be shallow by including the latter, but let’s face it: beauty helps.

Wheeler is a sales representative from Tampa. She won Orlando’s Got Talent and describes her music as “country, pop, soul, glam, fun.”

The 24-year old also says she loves the ocean. Will viewers love her in Hollywood? Check out her audition below and decide for yourself.

Congratulations are in order for Andrew Shue and Amy Robach.

The former Melrose Place star and the Weekend Today anchor were married Saturday afternoon in New York City.

The paid met last April at a book party and got engaged in September. They tied the know The Lighthouse at Chelsea Piers, which looks over the Hudson River. 

Shue’s mother officiated the ceremony, the two wrote their own vows and it was actually Robach’s 37th birthday.

Move over, Mason Dash.

Step aside, Hank IV.

Sorry, Vida Alves.

There’s a new, adorable baby in our celebrity gossip world and his name is Benjamin Stephen.

Indeed, blogger “Free Britney” welcomed the first baby into the THG family this weekend, as his wife gave birth to a son last night.

After a long labor, everyone is doing well and resting comfortably, while Free Britney laments the fact his child shares a birthday with former Lindsay Lohan boy toy Calum Best and drunken bank robber Rip Torn.

Forget Kourtney and Kendra: Send in your best wishes to Free Britney and his new family today!